Wednesday, March 29, 2006

madman's party

hey there jimmy ol'pal
are you sure you feel ok?
your nose seems to be caving in
you smell of bad decay

your face and clothes are caked with bugs
of maggots, lice, and moths
your orifice is leaking worms
the ammonia has worn off

you haven't even touched your cake
that's on the plate in front of you
but seriously though, are you alright?
your skin is turning mottled blue.

don't stare with that accusing look
you're not my enemy
i couldn't let our friendship break
i'd die of agony

don't you worry 'bout your severed arm
what's super glue can't handle?
so cheer up pal, it's your birthday now
make a wish and blow out the candles

41 comments:

Scraps said...

Isn't it sad how a person's "friends" can see someone falling apart before their very eyes, yet do nothing about it and pretend that all is normal?

s.J. said...

yes.

;iulu said...

or they're too naïve to be alive. what else are friends for than to prop you up and duct-tape you back to together..

s.J. said...

you got to preserve what you've got...

Scraps said...

Duct tape is for sticking what should be stuck, and WD-40 is for unsticking what shouldn't. Right?

s.J. said...

you'd have to ask my grandfather about that...

;iulu said...

nu-uh my grandpa.

s.J. said...

nananah-booboo.

s.J. said...
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s.J. said...
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;iulu said...

dunno, he was too busy picking out a new lawn mower. I told him to ONLY buy a push mower (no self-powered-- I need the extra exertion-inducing steps) else I wouldn't mow the lawn. know whta? he listened!

s.J. said...

whoa.
his hearing aids finally work!
amazing!

;iulu said...

hey! easy on the hearing-aids. not yet. he's cool. (I plan to follow in his footsteps and hitchhike to Cali one day..)

s.J. said...
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s.J. said...

tsk tsk. not a headbanger in his youth, eh?

[whiney little brother voice] can i come too?

;iulu said...

only if you bring the shrunken heads and your usual dose of sj-ism.

s.J. said...

will do.
when do we leave?

Anonymous said...

ye.
do leave the neshek at home. i don't trust myself.

i leave at dawn.

s.J. said...

woohoo!
i'm so pumped.
i brought the fraps this time.

Anonymous said...

no. i'll get fat. then the bullet won't help.

s.J. said...

(califlower) soup?

Anonymous said...

:whimper:

s.J. said...

(why the long face?)

;iulu said...

'cuz me want zuppa now..

s.J. said...

i TOLD YOU how to make it!
get moving, sister!

;iulu said...

I need the tongue (replete with taste buds) to eye me while I eat there. What's the fun of making it at home when you can hobnob with the cool peeps..

s.J. said...

then you know what to do...

;iulu said...

(but i'm scared they'l look at me cross-eyed from the freezer..)



:shiver:

s.J. said...

sticks and stones may break my bones, but heads will never hurt me.

;iulu said...

that's cuz they're your friends.
heck, you sleep with heads! they scare me every time i come for a slumberparty :(

s.J. said...

well, if you'd talk to them nicely...

;iulu said...

i do. but they bare their teeth and gnash them just when im drifting off to sleep. and they know it gives me the creeps. and mom tells them to stop bothering me, but they say only you can control them. I even brought them choice-offerings last time and the big one bit me. waaaaah.

fine. next time i sleep on the ceiling.

s.J. said...

fine.
there's enough spiderwebs for you to stick.

Scraps said...

S.j., are your heads misbehaving again? Tell them to stop bothering flor, or I'll have to cook them for dinner.

;iulu said...

please do. the protein is good for you. i don't know why he keeps them till they dry out. there's no squish left then..

boys..!

Scraps said...

But flor, I thought you won't eat brains?

;iulu said...

continue to cultivate them. igor will dispose of them properly when the time comes.

s.J. said...

not listening!
we're entering them in the county fair!

Scraps said...

As long as they're out of the house by the end of the week.

s.J. said...

sho ting.

Scraps said...

Good boy.